Not the Least Bit Vague!

I’m really getting sick of seeing MSN advertise for their horoscopes in the little box where they usually put news stories. I’m also getting sick of seeing Monster.com advertise for “career horoscopes” every time I log into my e-mail.

So, in celebration of Friday the 13th, I thought I’d go through and emphasise all the vague words in my horoscope for today.

Some important plans (Gasp! I never have important plans!), perhaps for a vacation or involving education in some way, could well be temporarily blocked by circumstances beyond your control, dear (zodiac sign removed to avoid being stereotyped by any believers in astrology. Please judge me by my skin colour personality instead, thanks). This can cause considerable upset and might even set your temper on edge. You may be tempted to take your frustrations out on others. It would be far more productive – and a lot more challenging – to work on finding ways to make your plans work, even if there is a delay. Go to it!

Looking at the words I underlined, I count 13 (13! It’s everywhere! AH!) vague words. When looking at it in context, there’s no real prediction which doesn’t have a “might” word in front of it. But hey, lure somebody in and they’ll probably start wanting to take advantage of the other astrological services MSN offers.

For only $12, I can get a “Karma Report” that will tell me about my past lives! But, that’s ok… I already know that in my past life I was an amoeba.

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3 responses to this post.

  1. Good writing. Keep up the good work. I just added your RSS feed my Google News Reader..

    Matt Hanson

  2. Posted by Kerr on June 13, 2008 at 9:16 am

    “zodiac sign removed to avoid being stereotyped by any believers in astrology. Please judge me by my personality instead, thanks”

    Typical Piscean :þ

  3. I’ve been waiting for a perfect post from you. This is it!

    Wish I had a t-shirt that says: Astrology is Bullshit

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