How to be Psychic

May 7, 2008

Oh, it really isn’t that hard at all. The only person you really need to fool is yourself, and that’s more than easy to do. According to “Psychic Journey”, you just need to follow four easy steps!

  1. Be open to psychic energy
  2. Expect psychic energy
  3. Trust psychic energy
  4. Act on psychic energy

I won’t really go into the details of all four steps, but to do number one…

Being open to psychic guidance means acknowledging psychic events when they occur rather than minimising or dismissing their significance, as you may have done in the past. It’s the first step on the pathway of psychic development. It’s a shift that will make your experience different from that of a closed-minded person and that will allow your life to be assisted by your psychic abilities.

Mmm… yes… simple translation: kill your skepticism or you won’t be psychic.

Well, no duh. The whole point of skepticism is seeking other explanations for phenomena than psychic energy, and setting up tests so that you can rule out anything else.

If you’re expecting psychic energy, you’re just all the more open to confirmation bias (noticing all the hits you get and ignoring the misses).

If you trust and act on psychic energy… well… let me put it this way. My English teacher had a dream about all of us doing stacks of goal-setting (aka, busy work) in class and decided that you should always do what your dreams tell you to do. I just love busy work. I just hope she doesn’t get a dream with me getting an F in her class.

And, if you decide to give Psychic Journey the benefit of the doubt anyway, against all reason, you can purchase a book that will make you believe falsely that you’re psychic for a cool 40 pounds (that’s about $80).

Or, I can implore you to trust your skepticism and you can save $80 for free. Woot!

3 Responses to “How to be Psychic”

  1. Evolved Rationalist Says:

    Self-delusion is a bitch. Sigh.

  2. musesusan Says:

    I don’t need a book to be psychic. I can see the future! For instance, I foresee that I will click the “submit comment” button in about a minute, and then go have lunch. I don’t understand why other psychics can’t give such precise predictions.

  3. podblack Says:

    Ew. Speaking as a former English teacher, what a hell of a way to kill an afternoon for everyone. Ick.

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